Sugarpop
Warren calls Gianna "Sugarpop" and the other day when he said, "there's my sugarpop," she responded with, "I'm not your sugarpop, Grampa, I'm Gramma's muffin."
Losing A Son
Dealing with Tommy's death this last year has left me wondering what Gramma Campbell felt as she dealt with the death of her son, my father, who was just 23 years old when he died in 1959.
Missing Tommy
August 21st is just a few days away. It is a day that marks time for me now, for it was one year ago, on August 21, 2009, that my firstborn son, Thomas Jeffrey Clements, left this world at the age of 32 and I miss him terribly.I ordered flowers today, in his memory, for this weekend's service at church. It's hard to believe that a year has passed since I last saw his face and heard his voice. On one hand it seems like yesterday that he was here, but on the other, it seems like forever since I last saw or touched him.
For a while after his death, some people would approach with awkward attempts at offering sympathy while others would say just the right thing. Now only a few people say anything at all. Maybe they don't know what to say, or maybe they think that talking about it is too painful for me. Please know that it helps me to talk about and to remember Tommy. He was much too important in my life to sidestep discussion, as if he never existed.
Some ask how I'm doing, and I've even had a few assure me that time heals all wounds. A few have wondered if I'm over it and through the grieving process. They wonder if life has returned to normal. I think it's fair to say that I will never be “over it” and life, as I knew it, is gone forever. Some well-meaning but misguided smile and say, “Rejoice, he is in heaven!” I know that he is in heaven, but I want him here with me. Because he is not, I am sad.
Am I getting through it? Yes. Some days are better than others. Random things will trigger memories that I did not even know I stored. The memory plays out, leaving me comforted and sad at the same time.
There is no doubt that my pain is deep, but my faith is deeper. God has kept His promises to me and to my family. He has been there for us though it has been, and continues to be, hard. Our sorrow is not as those who have no hope, but we do feel it and will continue to shed tears. That’s because our love for Tommy continues on.
Quoting Pastor Greg
After this year's Harvest Crusade at Angel Stadium, Pastor Greg Laurie was quoted as saying, "Life is messy and life is painful but God is great and God is good." He added, "And there are answers in the Bible." Truer words were never spoken.
We Just Love Each Other
Dave was loading his kids into the truck last Sunday after a weekend at our house. "Bye, Gramma, I love you," says four-year old Gianna, "have a great day at work tomorrow." "I love you too, Gianna," I answer as I'm hugging and kissing everyone. She says it again, "I love you Gramma, I'm going to miss you. Have a great day at work tomorrow." I wave, "I love you too, honey, I'll see you soon." She says it again and Gavin looks at her, "Okay, Gianna, that's enough." She stops waving, looks at him and says, "I can't help it. We just love each other so much."
